It’s a lot easier to get things done when you’re surrounded by people who care about you and your work. People will cover for you, support you, train and guide you, and you will be a valued member of a productive team. To be pleasant and professional in work is one thing; to be friendly outside of the workplace is quite another. The dividing line is how much of your darkest secrets you should be willing to disclose with others. But remember that even though you may be pleasant and have a solid connection, business and friendship are two distinct entities. 

The worst thing that you can do to someone is tell them your secrets. Once you have told them, you cannot untell them. You can not go back in time and undo it and you are very vulnerable and not in control of the outcomes. 

Things Not to Share With Your Workmates:

  1. Just keep the details between you and Human Resources as to how much money you make. Disclosement suggests that you cannot maintain a secret.The more chatty you are, the less you can be trusted. If you are telling everyone your secrets, and possibly the secrets of others, it will get around, and less people will trust you.
  1. It’s normal to feel like an imposter from time to time. Don’t let anybody know that you’re unsure about your own identity. You’re capable of doing the job. Be confident and assertive. 
  1. Becoming a whiner, even if you don’t have any complaints about your job, will give you a terrible name in the workplace. The more nasty things you say about a colleague, the more likely it is that you’ll be seen as untrustworthy. If you are saying bad things about someone to someone, that person will assume that you are also saying bad things about them too. 
  1. Politics and religion are two subjects that elicit strong feelings from people. In doing so, you may alienate a coworker or be seen as a negative influence on your team mates. You should never make the assumption that your colleagues reflect your political or religious views, no matter how well-informed they seem to be.
  1. The workplace is not the place to air your frustrations about your personal relationships. Because they can’t help, they’ll either be embarrassed by your situation or think of you as a romantic trainwreck because of it.

The unwritten rules of sharing at the workplace are distinct from those you’d hear on the street. Taking a minute to think about what may be irritating your coworkers may help you avoid aggravating them, too. Having these boundaries helps other people know where they stand with you and show them that you can be trusted with information, since you are not going to gossip and share.